insecure wife ruining marriage

Doesn't go out, doesn't have any friends anymore. The problem is that when she assumes it is personal, her man chooses to respond in defensive ways. your marriage, then this can be identified as a sure sign your wife is insecure. People feel insecure, and they hate that feeling, and they don't want to feel it anymore, and they think, "Ah ha! Irrational and excessive jealousy can eventually destroy a relationship. And yet everybody will accept having behaved foolishly (or have been at the receiving end of such behaviour) at some point in their relationships because they felt threatened. Even without proof, you cant help but doubt your partners loyalty and love for you. Over time, the marital relationship becomes more and more important for her, but meanwhile, other necessary relationships matter less and less to her. How to overcome codependency in marriage Fix the marriage. Abnormal jealousy wreaks havoc on a relationship as the jealous person becomes more and more fearful, angry, and controlling. How to keep intimacy in your marriage Improve marital intimacy. Do not do anything that can damage or destroy the bridge of trust. Of course, it is difficult to notice this problem at the beginning of your marriage. It is quite normal for a wife to have feelings of insecurity once in a while. I don't understand why can't she stop. 5 tips on how to make your husband feel loved and respected, If you are insecure in love, is it worth it? Signs of insecurity in men unsurprisingly lead back to social media. You may be paranoid, wondering if your mate has naughty apps or carries on inappropriate conversations in private messages. Verywell Mind articles are reviewed by board-certified physicians and mental healthcare professionals. What causes a person to feel insecure in the relationship? She has punished me long enough. Why does she act that way? For example, she may feel there is a need to regularly and frequently look through her mans phone, laptop, and social media accounts; and she can make various excuses for such behavior, even though that is indeed unnecessary, abnormal, or even irrational. Kathryn Rateliff Barr has taught birth, parenting, vaccinations and alternative medicine classes since 1994. Having said that, the easiest way to comfort a man is throughpositive reaffirmations. She is extremely insecure and has very low self esteem because of her extremely difficult past. 2010-2023 Parenting.FirstCry.com. Are you working or just spending some time with another girl?. If you were hurt in the past, it's normal to have some fears about a recurrence, but remind yourself that your current spouse is not your former partner. Signs of insecurities in a relationship You're jealous Some insecurities stem from a painful past. What's more, this type of jealousy is not a one-time thing. Your insecurities in marriage may or may not be warranted, but they create unhealthy behaviors regardless of your reasoning. Tyrrell says this can occur because of your need to control all aspects of the relationship. As a result, your relationship may become very toxic, leading to an insecure husband ruining your marriage. And the one way you do this is by always demeaning them, and pulling them down. Although, sometimes it's simply jumping to the wrong conclusions because the mind tends to make everything about us. They are both committed to the relationship and are not insecure about who they are as individuals. Here is one of the most common insecurities in a relationship that will serve as insecurities examples for all of us. And this thought becomes particularly clear when she is going through a bad time because she easily gets into the negative mindset that if you have a better time than her, you may look down upon her and leave her. Insecurities show up when we encounter triggers. Engage your me-time positively expand your personality, do things that make you happy, and realise you are more than a significant other. Your partner hasnt given you any reason to doubt his feelings, yet you dont feel at ease. Intimacy is beautiful, and it makes any relationship stronger. When you dont get to do it, it bothers you. Why do you like me anyway? The single-most significant cause of insecurity isfear. Some reassurance from your partner is expected to make you feel special in your relationship, but it should not consume your conversations. How Insecurity Almost Destroyed My Marriage - iBelieve.com That's my life. I can't live with this with the nonsense. As discussed above, rarely is the other partners behaviour (or their actions) at the root of feelings of insecurity. I have NEVER cheated on my wife. We now have a healthy sex life but seems like every week something new bends her nose out of wack. They may resort to financial abuse, verbal bullying, and violence in order to maintain control and alleviate or mask their feelings. The words like I couldnt have lived without you are often regarded as a romantic gesture. a big loss of faith in the marriage. The only way to overcome insecurity is to develop mutual trust. No matter how long youve been together or how much you love each other, there will be times when you need to hear your partners assurance. The key is that you discuss the issues calmly and come up with solutions together. It is because it can drain you. So it is inadvisable to always ignore your wifes feedback when she feels insecure. Did you ever get dumped for your prettier hot bestie? Weve all been there young, single, and crushing on someone whom we thought waswaaayout of our league! How Insecurity Can Ruin a Marriage | Our Everyday Life How can you be happy with all these intrusive thoughts? So maybe your insecurities are in fact a classic case of Once bitten, twice shy!. Ask questions. Without trust, a relationship is doomed. According to a survey by Divorce-Online UK, approximately one in three divorces result from disagreements related to social media. Like most other difficult emotional experiences, if treated correctly, jealousy can be a trigger for growth. others is a reflection of ourselves. 7 Signs Your Insecurities Are Affecting Your Relationship - Bustle It may not be evident at first, but you manifest signs of insecurity as you go deeper into your relationship. Cyberpsychol Behav Soc Netw. As soon as you start seeing signs of any insecurity in your spouse, try to talk to them about it. JavaScript is disabled. By clicking Accept All Cookies, you agree to the storing of cookies on your device to enhance site navigation, analyze site usage, and assist in our marketing efforts. Overcoming insecurity in relationships is a lonely battle. Read our. Verywell Mind's content is for informational and educational purposes only. What if nothing is going on? Again, a little insecurity is normal; sometimes, we also have some insecurity over our spouses loving us. When a healthy relationship experiences jealousy, it comes from a place of protection. But, sadly, this communication almost never happens for most couples. Realise that you are enough, in and of yourself, and you do not need a man, woman, relationship, kids, family, to justify your existence or how awesome you are. I am tired of being sick and tired. My wifes insecurity is ruining my marriage!!!! - Talk About Marriage the 3 options above, the third option is the best. Medical Reviewers confirm the content is thorough and accurate, reflecting the latest evidence-based research. You are responsible for your happiness. Social media is a notorious relationship killer, so theres a reason to doubt the ease with which infidelity can happen over networking sites. Occasional jealousy is natural, but when it becomes intense or irrational, it can seriously damage a relationship. Part of the reason some insecurities are more often and strongly felt by a certain gender is because of the stereotypes we have created: men should be macho sex-machines, who are always confident and self-assured, while women are supposed to be giving, loving, caring, and selfless, eternal reservoirs of love and understanding. An interesting aspect of insecurity is that it actually stems from low self-esteem. Guilt and insecurity is ruining my marriage. Me [31F] Husband - reddit As their [partners] try to avoid them, their worst fears of losing love and respect are realized,"says psychotherapist Robert L. Barker in "The Green-Eyed Marriage.". Where do relationship insecurities come from? Meaning, History, Signs and Types, According to Zodiac Signs: the 3 Best Women to Marry, How To Connect With A Man On An Emotional Level, The Role of Romance in a Relationship and its Importance, How Important Is Intimacy in a Relationship, Feeling No Emotional Connection With Your Husband, How to Get Back Together After Separation, 6 Ways to Tell if Someone is Lying About Cheating, 5 Signs That You Are Living in a Toxic Marriage, 7 Important Tips to Build Trust in a Relationship, 10 Effective Communication Skills for Healthy Marriages, 20 Signs of a Married Man in Love With Another Woman. 8 Things Husbands Do To Destroy A Marriage - Her Norm Some people prey on weak people and assure them they are loved and wanted. If you start feeling insecure in a relationship, it would be hard for you to go back. In order to feel more secure in a marriage, it helps to know what you have to offer your spouse. Did you enter the relationship just to feel this way? Parenting.Firstcry.com accepts no liability for any errors, omissions or misrepresentations. In other words, you are open to considering what she wants you to change, Do everything in your power to protect and guard it. Give time some time to do its magic, and show you that there was no reason to feel insecure. Therefore, she is prone to bring you down rather than encourage you to make achievements, no matter it is for your life or career. This fear of being alone can also lead you to stay in an unhealthy relationship that does not deserve your time or attention. But you holding this BS over my head too long. It might not be perfect, but a clear picture of reality can help you target whats wrong. 10 She doesnt encourage you to chase dreams or success: If you are in a happy marriage, it is clear that you and your spouse will both want the best for each other. Invest time, energy, effort, feelings in your friends, work, family, in-laws, children, hobbies even! If you were hurt in the past, its normal to have some fears about a recurrence, but remind yourself that your current spouse is not your former partner. Is Your Insecurity Ruining Your Marriage - 7 Ways To Tackle It While labels give you identity, they also limit it. When you question a truly committed and faithful partner owing to your insecurities, when you doubt their loyalty and fidelity because you cant get over or past the doubt in your mind, you are hurting an honest person.